With Elli

There was a time in my life when I never lived alone. Photo By With Elli I went from my family home to relationships, friendships, and love stories — always trying to belong somewhere . I thought that being part of something meant I was safe, that I had meaning. But the truth is… I was scared of being by myself. I depended on people to define me — family, friends, partners — and I was constantly trying to hold things together, terrified that if something ended, I would disappear too. And yet, in the middle of all that effort to not be alone , I had never felt lonelier. Because I wasn’t with me. I didn’t even know who “me” really was. And honestly, I didn’t even like myself that much. Therapy changed that. It wasn’t easy — it still isn’t. But therapy gave me a mirror. It helped me see myself , slowly, without judgment. To sit with my own company, to hang out with myself, and to start — little by little — to like me. Sometimes, even to love me. I realized that for most of my life, I...

Photo By With Elli The word “trauma” is often used to describe painful experiences, but in psychology—especially in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) —it has a very specific meaning. In this context, trauma refers to an experience that involves actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence . It is the core of what professionals call Trauma- and Stressor-Related Disorders , such as PTSD (Posttraumatic Stress Disorder) and ASD (Acute Stress Disorder). What Counts as a Traumatic Experience? A person can be affected by trauma in a few different ways: Directly experiencing something life-threatening or violent. Witnessing such an event happening to someone else. Learning that a close family member or friend experienced a violent or accidental death or serious harm. Repeated exposure to very disturbing details of trauma (like rescue workers, police, or emergency staff). Watching upsetting things on TV or social media doesn’t...

Photo by With Elli There is a quiet, ongoing conversation within each of us — an inner dialogue that shapes how we think, feel, and act. Most of the time, it happens unnoticed. Yet, it is this dialogue — the words we say to ourselves, the tone we use, the comfort or criticism we offer — that adds to our emotional world. To “be the parent to your in ner child” means to become conscious of that inner conversation and learn how to nurture, protect, and guide the childlike part within you that still longs to feel seen, safe, and loved. Understanding Our Inner Structure Psychiatrist Eric Berne , the founder of Transactional Analysis (TA) , described the human psyche as composed of three ego states: the Parent , the Adult , and the Child . These inner roles are not abstract ideas — they are living parts of our inner world, shaped by early experiences and the people who raised us. The Inner Parent represents the voices, attitudes, and behaviors we absorbed from our caregivers. It can be n...