With Elli

There was a time in my life when I never lived alone. Photo By With Elli I went from my family home to relationships, friendships, and love stories — always trying to belong somewhere . I thought that being part of something meant I was safe, that I had meaning. But the truth is… I was scared of being by myself. I depended on people to define me — family, friends, partners — and I was constantly trying to hold things together, terrified that if something ended, I would disappear too. And yet, in the middle of all that effort to not be alone , I had never felt lonelier. Because I wasn’t with me. I didn’t even know who “me” really was. And honestly, I didn’t even like myself that much. Therapy changed that. It wasn’t easy — it still isn’t. But therapy gave me a mirror. It helped me see myself , slowly, without judgment. To sit with my own company, to hang out with myself, and to start — little by little — to like me. Sometimes, even to love me. I realized that for most of my life, I...

Photo by With Elli There is a quiet, ongoing conversation within each of us — an inner dialogue that shapes how we think, feel, and act. Most of the time, it happens unnoticed. Yet, it is this dialogue — the words we say to ourselves, the tone we use, the comfort or criticism we offer — that adds to our emotional world. To “be the parent to your in ner child” means to become conscious of that inner conversation and learn how to nurture, protect, and guide the childlike part within you that still longs to feel seen, safe, and loved. Understanding Our Inner Structure Psychiatrist Eric Berne , the founder of Transactional Analysis (TA) , described the human psyche as composed of three ego states: the Parent , the Adult , and the Child . These inner roles are not abstract ideas — they are living parts of our inner world, shaped by early experiences and the people who raised us. The Inner Parent represents the voices, attitudes, and behaviors we absorbed from our caregivers. It can be n...

Friends are more than companions in our lives — they’re the people who walk beside us when life feels heavy and remind us that we don’t have to carry everything alone. Friends: How They Support You and Why You Need Them Friends help us hold the invisible weight of life. When we’re with someone we trust, we can let down our guard. We don’t have to explain every detail or pretend to be stronger than we feel. That sense of safety allows honesty and vulnerability to come through. Sharing worries, joys, and struggles with a friend doesn’t mean they’ll fix everything — but it reminds us that we’re not alone. Their presence makes even the heaviest burdens lighter. We need friends because they mirror back our humanity: they see us when we feel invisible, they remind us of our worth when we doubt it, and they walk beside us when life feels overwhelming. That’s why it feels so healing to unburden your soul to someone safe and loving. Why It’s So Important for Humans to Talk About Their Probl...

Photo by With Elli Emotions are an essential part of being human — they shape our connections, drive our decisions, and color our experiences. But for some, emotions don’t just whisper; they roar. One of the most challenging aspects of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), or the presence of BPD traits, is the intensity and rapid shifting of emotions. As someone who relates to several BPD traits, I’ve often felt like my emotional world was turned up to maximum volume. Small triggers can spark overwhelming feelings, and navigating those waves takes more energy than most people realize. But why does this happen? What makes the emotional experience in BPD so vivid, raw, and at times, extreme? Let’s explore what we know — both emotionally and neurologically — about these inner storms. 🧠 What Happens in the Brain? 1. The Amygdala: The Brain's Alarm System The amygdala is a small almond-shaped region deep in the brain, responsible for detecting threats and generating emotional re...

Photo by Mockaroon on Unsplash ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) is something I’ve learned about through people close to me—friends, family, students, and members of the neurodivergent communities I’ve met through my volunteer work. I do not have ADHD myself, but I've always felt a deep need to understand it—beyond the stereotypes and surface-level labels. This blog post is a reflection of that journey: the questions I’ve asked, the moments that sparked curiosity, the emotional weight of watching someone struggle, and the many ways ADHD reveals its complexity in real life. It’s about what it means to be a neurotypical person trying to support and connect with people who experience the world in different ways. 💭 First Encounters with Neurodiversity My first direct experience with neurodivergent individuals came through volunteering in: 🏫 A special education school in Evosmos, Thessaloniki 👁️‍🗨️ The School for the Blind in Thessaloniki 🎭 A neurodivergent a...

I haven’t been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) , but I’ve been told by professionals that I have BPD traits . That distinction is important. I share this not to promote self-diagnosis, but to bring more awareness, empathy, and understanding — both for those who may relate and for those who care for someone with these patterns. Living with traits of BPD doesn’t define me, but it has shaped how I relate to the world, others, and myself. Here’s a look into my personal experience — along with some characteristics that others with BPD may experience. Photo by With Elli 🌱 How BPD Traits Show Up for Me These are traits that I personally experience and continue to explore in therapy and self-reflection: Deep sensitivity to rejection — even small signs of disconnection can feel painful or triggering. Fear of abandonment , even in stable relationships. Sometimes, I fear that people I love will leave, even without clear reason. Emotional intensity — I feel thi...

Photo By With Elli My Reflections on BPD Traits and Emotional Survival I want to start with something important: 👉 I haven’t been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). But I have been diagnosed with Borderline traits —patterns that reflect some of the emotional intensity, relational sensitivity, and inner instability that people with BPD often experience. I’m sharing this not to label myself or promote self-diagnosis, but to offer a window into how these traits show up in my life—and how I’m learning to live with them more gently. Because when I first started learning about BPD, something inside me exhaled. I felt seen in a way I hadn’t before. Something whispered, “This explains the part of you no one ever understood.” 🌧 What This Has Looked Like for Me Fearing abandonment , even when people haven’t left Overgiving until I’m emotionally depleted—then disappearing out of shame Feeling like a burden , while craving closeness with every fiber of my...

Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash 🕊 The Room, the Wall, and the Dance of Co-Regulation Inside my mind, there's a room. It started as an image in therapy, a space where my younger self existed — isolated, frightened. A place with no doors, no windows. Just grey walls and silence. But over time, that room began to change. A door appeared. Then windows. Light entered. And for the first time, I could speak to the child inside — the younger version of me. I could sit with her. I could listen. I began imagining knocking down the wall that separates her world from the open, warm feeling of a living room — a safe, shared space. I wished I could free her. I still do. This process — of visualizing the inner child and slowly transforming their environment — is a therapeutic technique used in inner child work , guided imagery , and Internal Family Systems (IFS) . But it's also deeply tied to a concept called co-regulation . 💞 What Is Co-Regulation? Co-regulation is when two people help...

Some days, even when we try our best, it feels oddly difficult to say: “I’m proud of myself. I deserve rest. I deserve a treat.” If you’ve ever found yourself struggling to reward yourself — or even just sit with your own effort — you’re not alone. For many of us, especially those who are deeply empathetic, neurodivergent, or grew up without consistent emotional support, self-kindness doesn’t come naturally. But why?

Photo by Markus Winkler on Unsplash 🌸Hymen and Virginity Many people grow up hearing things about the hymen and virginity that are not true. These ideas can make people feel ashamed, afraid, or judged. So let’s talk about what the hymen really is — and what it’s not. You deserve to know the truth about your body.  🔍 What Is the Hymen? The hymen is a small, soft piece of skin just inside the vagina. It’s not a “seal” that covers the whole opening. Most people are born with a hole in their hymen — that’s how blood comes out during your period. Some people are born with very little hymen at all , and that’s normal too. Every body is different. 💡 Can the Hymen Break? The hymen can stretch or tear , but not only because of sex . It can change when someone: Rides a bike or horse Does sports or dancing Uses a tampon or menstrual cup Masturbates or uses sex toys Has a medical exam Sometimes this causes bleeding or pain — but not always. Some people don...

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 I don’t remember the exact day I stopped using social media. It feels like many years ago, maybe even before the pandemic—but it’s hard to say for sure. What I do remember is the slow shift. I was no longer enjoying it. I began to feel like I was living through it instead of actually living . Everything started losing its taste, its meaning. A sunset wasn’t just a sunset anymore—it was a photo on a board, waiting to be liked. My life was becoming something to curate instead of something to feel. Eventually, I understood something simple but powerful: My profile isn’t me. And people aren’t profiles either. We’re all too layered, too contradictory, too beautifully complex to be summed up in filtered images or short captions. And when we try to compress ourselves into those spaces, something gets lost—something essential. I didn’t want to live like that. And the more I stayed on those platforms, the more I felt anxiety crawling in, slowly but surely. At some point, even lookin...

  In January 2019, in the heart of Thessaloniki, Greece, a small team of friends— Elli, Sofie, and Antony —came together with a big idea: to create an open, inclusive space for young people to explore, question, and learn about sexuality in a respectful and stigma-free environment. From this shared vision, SHAAG (Sexual Health Awareness Across Genders) was born. 🌱 Where It All Began SHAAG was more than a youth initiative—it was a heartfelt response to the gaps we saw in conversations about sex, relationships, and gender. We wanted to normalize curiosity, dismantle shame, and build a culture of openness. We believed—and still do—that sexuality is a natural, wonderful, and deeply human part of life that deserves to be talked about with honesty, respect, and joy. 💡 What We Did Over two exciting years, SHAAG became a hub for young people who were eager to learn and share. Through: Youth-led research Interactive online content Community dialogues we cultivated a space...