With Elli

Photo By With Elli The word “trauma” is often used to describe painful experiences, but in psychology—especially in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) —it has a very specific meaning. In this context, trauma refers to an experience that involves actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence . It is the core of what professionals call Trauma- and Stressor-Related Disorders , such as PTSD (Posttraumatic Stress Disorder) and ASD (Acute Stress Disorder). What Counts as a Traumatic Experience? A person can be affected by trauma in a few different ways: Directly experiencing something life-threatening or violent. Witnessing such an event happening to someone else. Learning that a close family member or friend experienced a violent or accidental death or serious harm. Repeated exposure to very disturbing details of trauma (like rescue workers, police, or emergency staff). Watching upsetting things on TV or social media doesn’t...

Photo by With Elli There is a quiet, ongoing conversation within each of us — an inner dialogue that shapes how we think, feel, and act. Most of the time, it happens unnoticed. Yet, it is this dialogue — the words we say to ourselves, the tone we use, the comfort or criticism we offer — that adds to our emotional world. To “be the parent to your in ner child” means to become conscious of that inner conversation and learn how to nurture, protect, and guide the childlike part within you that still longs to feel seen, safe, and loved. Understanding Our Inner Structure Psychiatrist Eric Berne , the founder of Transactional Analysis (TA) , described the human psyche as composed of three ego states: the Parent , the Adult , and the Child . These inner roles are not abstract ideas — they are living parts of our inner world, shaped by early experiences and the people who raised us. The Inner Parent represents the voices, attitudes, and behaviors we absorbed from our caregivers. It can be n...

We all carry stress. Some days it’s light, other days it feels like a heavy stone on our chest. But what happens when the weight never lifts? When extreme stress stays with us for too long, it begins to shape our body, our mind, and even the way we see ourselves. I’ve been reflecting on these questions — about stress, trauma, ADHD, Autism, AuDHD, and burnout — and I want to share what I’ve learned. My hope is that this can guide anyone who wants to understand themselves or someone they care about a little better. What happens if we don’t deal with extreme stress? Stress isn’t just a feeling — it’s something the body experiences physically, emotionally, and mentally. Over time, if it’s not addressed, it can lead to: Physical effects : Chronic headaches, high blood pressure, heart issues, digestive problems, weakened immune system, and disturbed sleep. Stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline flood the body, affecting organs and tissues. Mental effects : Anxiety, depression, irr...

For many autistic people, social interaction feels like a performance — not because they’re dishonest, but because they’ve had to learn to "mask" their natural ways of being in order to be accepted, understood, or safe. This is called masking , and it can happen all day, every day. What Is Masking? Masking involves things like: Photo by Jens Riesenberg on Unsplash Imitating facial expressions and tone of voice Forcing eye contact Hiding stimming (like fidgeting or self-soothing movements) Suppressing emotions or overwhelm Studying and rehearsing what to say before saying it Pretending to be “okay” — even when they’re not Many autistic people start masking from a young age, often unconsciously. Over time, it becomes second nature — but it’s not natural. It’s learned. And it’s exhausting . It’s Not Just Strangers — It’s Everyone Masking doesn’t only happen in formal situations or with strangers. It often shows up in daily conversations with: Pho...

Photo by With Elli Emotions are an essential part of being human — they shape our connections, drive our decisions, and color our experiences. But for some, emotions don’t just whisper; they roar. One of the most challenging aspects of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), or the presence of BPD traits, is the intensity and rapid shifting of emotions. As someone who relates to several BPD traits, I’ve often felt like my emotional world was turned up to maximum volume. Small triggers can spark overwhelming feelings, and navigating those waves takes more energy than most people realize. But why does this happen? What makes the emotional experience in BPD so vivid, raw, and at times, extreme? Let’s explore what we know — both emotionally and neurologically — about these inner storms. 🧠 What Happens in the Brain? 1. The Amygdala: The Brain's Alarm System The amygdala is a small almond-shaped region deep in the brain, responsible for detecting threats and generating emotional re...

Photo by Mockaroon on Unsplash ADHD (Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) is something I’ve learned about through people close to me—friends, family, students, and members of the neurodivergent communities I’ve met through my volunteer work. I do not have ADHD myself, but I've always felt a deep need to understand it—beyond the stereotypes and surface-level labels. This blog post is a reflection of that journey: the questions I’ve asked, the moments that sparked curiosity, the emotional weight of watching someone struggle, and the many ways ADHD reveals its complexity in real life. It’s about what it means to be a neurotypical person trying to support and connect with people who experience the world in different ways. 💭 First Encounters with Neurodiversity My first direct experience with neurodivergent individuals came through volunteering in: 🏫 A special education school in Evosmos, Thessaloniki 👁️‍🗨️ The School for the Blind in Thessaloniki 🎭 A neurodivergent a...

I haven’t been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) , but I’ve been told by professionals that I have BPD traits . That distinction is important. I share this not to promote self-diagnosis, but to bring more awareness, empathy, and understanding — both for those who may relate and for those who care for someone with these patterns. Living with traits of BPD doesn’t define me, but it has shaped how I relate to the world, others, and myself. Here’s a look into my personal experience — along with some characteristics that others with BPD may experience. Photo by With Elli 🌱 How BPD Traits Show Up for Me These are traits that I personally experience and continue to explore in therapy and self-reflection: Deep sensitivity to rejection — even small signs of disconnection can feel painful or triggering. Fear of abandonment , even in stable relationships. Sometimes, I fear that people I love will leave, even without clear reason. Emotional intensity — I feel thi...

Photo By With Elli My Reflections on BPD Traits and Emotional Survival I want to start with something important: 👉 I haven’t been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). But I have been diagnosed with Borderline traits —patterns that reflect some of the emotional intensity, relational sensitivity, and inner instability that people with BPD often experience. I’m sharing this not to label myself or promote self-diagnosis, but to offer a window into how these traits show up in my life—and how I’m learning to live with them more gently. Because when I first started learning about BPD, something inside me exhaled. I felt seen in a way I hadn’t before. Something whispered, “This explains the part of you no one ever understood.” 🌧 What This Has Looked Like for Me Fearing abandonment , even when people haven’t left Overgiving until I’m emotionally depleted—then disappearing out of shame Feeling like a burden , while craving closeness with every fiber of my...

Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash 🕊 The Room, the Wall, and the Dance of Co-Regulation Inside my mind, there's a room. It started as an image in therapy, a space where my younger self existed — isolated, frightened. A place with no doors, no windows. Just grey walls and silence. But over time, that room began to change. A door appeared. Then windows. Light entered. And for the first time, I could speak to the child inside — the younger version of me. I could sit with her. I could listen. I began imagining knocking down the wall that separates her world from the open, warm feeling of a living room — a safe, shared space. I wished I could free her. I still do. This process — of visualizing the inner child and slowly transforming their environment — is a therapeutic technique used in inner child work , guided imagery , and Internal Family Systems (IFS) . But it's also deeply tied to a concept called co-regulation . 💞 What Is Co-Regulation? Co-regulation is when two people help...